Category Archives: Life
Daylight Saving Time in Holland
It’s almost midnight here in the Netherlands. Another couple of hours and we are back to the ‘summer time’. This means we all will experience a lack of an hour sleep. I am glad it happens in the weekend as I need to adjust my mood before going back to work on Monday. Being at work at 9 in the morning is just nice but spending another hour in the evening because the real time of arrival was 10am might be an issue. It’s not that I leave my work on time every day but I might have an appointment on Monday evening with a certain financial institution to talk about the cheapest interest rate they are offering. Luckily there is no such thing in my schedule.
The change of time will also mean that I am closer to home and at the same time, I am older an hour compare to the winter time.
So, to the new time. Welcome summer time and enjoy the spring season, soon to be summer. 
Rhytmn of My Life
It’s Chinese New Year evening. There is not much happening at this side of the world apart from cooking, eating, watching tv and thinking. Not to mention the part of feeling sorry for myself for being away from my beloved ones back home on these special days.
The memories of my yester years came back when I went through my old photos that I took them with me during my holiday last year July. My childhood memories of moving from one place to another. My school days at 3 different primary schools and finally my secondary school. Later when I went to work and met a lot of people and then my time in college.
Life back then was not easy. From my babyhood till when I reached adulthood. Fear was the one thing I lived by. Fear of not obtaining flying colours at school. Fear of not being liked by my new classmates and teachers in a place full of strangers. Fear of having to see my loved ones (tortured) in the power of a person who was beside the person-self. Fear of losing the person I loved to someone of something else. Fear that I would turn up to be a weak creature or even worse a monster. Fear of a lot of unmentionable things.
Courage was not one of my strengths. There was no one to encourage me to do what was best. I was left to decide myself or to just close my heart for the most important decision in my supposed to be future life. Hence I lost everything. I blamed them. I blamed Him. Yet I was the one to be blamed… for lacking of courage.
One by one of the episodes came by. Erasing them from my memory was not an easy task. They liked to be played even without a permission. There was that tune and another one. A rough one and then sweet. The wind was blowing softly and the leaves were smiling happily. When I looked up, it was that bird again. So small but so free. I wished I was a bird.
I came back into the present. The reality! I looked back at some of the photos and put them to where they belonged.
This was just the rhytmn of my life. No regrets of the past and no fear of the future. Just live the present, sprinkle it with lots of love.
Happy Valentine’s day to the past, the present and with God’s will, the future. My Dear!
Random Talk Update
Helloooo. Have you missed me? Sorry for my long absence. That happens when one tries to live a life full of excitement. 
Apparently I’m not the only one who hasn’t updated her blog. I’ve been visiting my fellow bloggers and grinning from ear to ear when I saw their last post was in January or even last year December. 
Meaning I can be forgiven, can’t I?
Welcoming 2010 was not as merrier as last year. I didn’t invite many friends as last year’s but only my fellow Paparian girlfriend and her husband who live 7 minutes away from my place. I managed to make several photographs of the beautiful fireworks. As usual every year, I’ve been calling home in Sabah to share with my family the loud and noisy fireworks from here. Millions of Euros were spent for the fireworks alone. As it turned out, I’ve suffered homesick for the first time after more than a decade away from my country, my dear family and friends. It could also be for a reason that lead me to a certain tragedy.
The weather didn’t help much either. It had been cold, below zero degree Celcius and sometimes the real feel was far worse than the real temperature. For the first time after perhaps 20 years (according to my Dutch friends), the country was covered with lots of snow for weeks. I had so much fun taking pictures at first but then the fun went away when I was infected by some viruses. Depression in winter time is normal due to the lack of sun and positive mind. I did my best to be happy and to look happy when I realised I have eye-bags. Not sure if it would help but no harm trying, right? 
Oh, did I mention that it’s January and the Year-End crazyness was here? Did I also mention that I managed to get my butt of my desk for a couple of weeks? Ha! Gotcha! I had a nice resting weeks but still I had to work even from my dreams. Sucks!
I wish to share some photos with you but I am so hungry now that I do not have time to edit the photos and upload them here. I know it’s past 8pm already but I just can’t help from not eating every 1 or 2 hours. (The reason why I don’t share my latest photos with you.)
I might be back to tell you other tales. But I can’t promise. Anyway, it’s almost Chinese New Year and also Valentine’s day. I would like to wish my Chinese family, relatives and friends GONG XI FA CAI, WAN SHI LU YI.
Who wants ang pow?
Happy December
It’s the first day of December and I’m back!
Hoping to make a fresh start and not the my-new-year’s-resolution do any longer. For more than a decade, it’s been the same old tale. So, I wish to try something new: Live the present, forget future and bury the past. Or should it be: Bury the past, forget future but live the present? Oh well! Whatever suits!
Year of 2009! What a shame! I buried 2 family members (pardon me, 1 was cremated), having to say “sorry for your loss” countless of times, and having to hear the news that someone (who used to be a close friend) was just buried yesterday. Or was it last week? Forgive my memory full. I just try to catch up something that no longer is a breaking news.
Other than that, it is a story that deserves to be printed someday, when the time comes. Or I might share it here one of these days. Be curious and you’ll know what bothers your mind.
Happy December! May it will bring a fruitful journey throughout the month.
Question Mark
I’m here at Changi Airport in Singapore. It’s a weird feeling… all sorts. But mostly sad, sad, sad. Is grandma still waiting for me? Can she cope with the pain and the waiting? Is it no longer an is but a was? It remains a big question mark to me. Are you still with us grandma?
I hope I’m still able to see her and she me.
On the other hand… there is that other feeling… nervous…
A Dream
Looking up at the blue sky while sitting at the veranda of my parents´ house, I felt so calm. I knew I still had things to do: finding some specific photos from my old albums. The photos of a person whom had ruled my heart from ages ago when we were still teenagers, more than 2 decades ago. But I thought the searching could wait, so I closed my eyes.
The memory of last night´s dream hit me. Why? After all these years? Why was I shown that specific face? Without words, without a smile nor a tear. The face. Why was it so calm? It showed thousands things but also showed nothing at all. I wanted to ask, I wanted to say something but my tongue was numb. I failed again. Then I turned to Him up there. “Dear God, what is the meaning of this all? What are You trying to tell me?” It was quiet. I heard nothing. The face, I couldn´t forget. It was so calm. He was calm.
I opened my eyes. I remembered the dream last night. I missed the face. It had been one and a half decades after the last episode. “How is he doing now? Does he still hate me? Does he know that I´m still alive? Does he care at all?” I looked up again. Felt like shouting but I couldn´t blame Him. I couldn´t blame myself nor him. What did the dream mean? Why did he come again after all these years? Until when would this torture end?
I looked down and saw the greens. I thought to myself, it was nothing but a dream. So, I got up from the seat and went to start looking for those precious photos of my dear one.
Friday At Last
Ah! It’s Friday again!
Who doesn’t like Fridays? Well! Not me. At least I DIDN’T!
I was not ready to enter the senior citizen world yet. So I didn’t like weekends. It does sound weird (doesn’t it?) since my weekends mostly were occupied with events, things to do, places to visit, people to entertain or simply just to sleep-in till noon. The thing of living in this country is: there is really NO exciting expectations but to grab the wet sponge and start wiping the windows or cleaning the toilets and bathroom. Not to mention going to the supermarkets to get the groceries for the coming days or week and then getting in a long que to finally be able to pay.
That’s what those who work full time, Monday to Friday, do in this country on their so exciting weekends. It’s natural to do the housechores and shopping groceries on Saturdays. The reason is the discounted gas price during the weekend. In fact, it is also applicable to the weekdays but only from 11.00pm onwards till 7.00am the next morning. If you were obsessed with the less-bills-to-pay, you might want to do this at night during the weekdays and enjoy the weekends for your social events.
But doing the cleaning, polishing and vacuming work after a hard and long day work? Indeed! A big NO NO to me.
So, I got annoyed when during my “trial and error”of getting at least a decent few hours of sleep at night, I got to hear all sorts of noise. Although not so loud, I still could hear it. A realisation: I would gain another sleepless night and look like a zombie-awaken-from-its-sleep.
Although the house has a good insulation, sometimes I feel like living in a very old and cold house with the feeling of kicking out the neighbours since they do the laundry work at night. I might exaggerate as it was my own fault not to fall asleep before it was 5am.*sigh*
Where was I?
Right! The Fridays. It was THEN! (That I did not like Fridays!)
Now, I can hardly wait for Friday to come as it has some medicine that can cure my wound.
TGIF!!!
Have a safe and wonderful weekend to you!
One Monday Morning
Good morning world,
It has been a while that I come to update you all in the morning. It’s morning indeed at almost 7 am on Monday in September.
I love Mondays. I just hate Sundays (as I have to think about waiting for another week for my little devil action) but Mondays are definitely my friends in terms of counting down the days. Not that I get to get back to the corporate world but because of a reason that only God knows what will happen.
For another reason, I am really excited to welcome another new member in the family in October. It’s either a fourth nephew or a second niece. It would be a joy to be back home and to be welcomed by this tiny sweety.
It’s almost half past 7 and I am still in n0-way can provide you with more updates. My mind is still in its dreamland but there was one special need to drag me away from the warm bed and on to the cyberworld.
Wish you all a wonderful day or night and be safe.
